14.02.03- It's Valentine's day and I would write some anti-Valentine's day propaganda but I'm not against it, it gives the economy the boost that it really needs. I had some big plans for today, unfortunately things turned out how I thought they would and not how I wanted. I'm not mad, and I'm not sad either, I'm dazed. I've been turned down before, but I'm not going to cry this time, probably because I'm not in 6th grade anymore. This is the first time that my turn down included more than "no". It was written, just as my note was written, nothing was spoken, and no, I won't be publishing the note. She said that I will find someone that I really like and that they will like me just as much, so I'm looking forward to that one. She also said not to be too upset, so I'm not. I think I'll write something better later, for now I'm just clownin'.
13.02.03- Today my words caught up with me. I taken to a dean's office and questioned about KylezNutz. Please don't ask me about it, ask someone else, maybe later I'll write all about it. It was an experience that broke me down, I can't write as well anymore, it is hard for me to be a lyrical terrorist anymore. Now I am always thinking about my audience, before I didn't really care, and I was only worried about making it sound good. I hope that I will get my skillz back, nothing is fo sho. The weather mirrored my situation, rainy and gray, all in all a bunch of crap. My patience is gone with my creativity, I'm sick of people asking me what happened, I will now only tell hot laides what happened, everyone else must ask someone else.
In other news: last night I wrote a little note which I intend to deliver tomarrow, I'm sure you know what I'm talking about, same subject as this.
07.02.03- I wrote the following sometime in January:
Today my cat Josie got ahold of my two little sisters' hampster and severely broke its leg. There are two ways to look at this: If you look at this favoring the hampster you will see an animal that is severely injured and will either die of its injuries or have to be put to sleep because the amount of suffering is so great. If you look at this favoring the cat you will see an animal that did not know it was bringing harm to something and was simply trying to have fun. It comes down to your ethics. Should the cate have its ass kicked (as it already has) and possibly killed (which my sister has said she wanted, but I don't think she meant it) because it brought so much suffering to the hampster, even thought it did not know what it was doing? I don't think that any rage, hate, or violence needs to come of this (although it already has). WE must feel sorrow and sadness for the hampster who lost its leg, its happiness, and possibly its life, and also be forgiving and understanding of the cat, who didn't know what it was doing and has been punished for what must have seem like nothing to the cat. The best plan of action would be to end the suffering of the hampster and try to teach the cat right from wrong. This is not a case like the one presented to us in Of Mice and Men where the subject can't do any good for anyone, and will do nothing but bring more harm because the cat can be taught (non-violently) not to attack hampsters or to tear up toilet paper rolls and couches, death is not necessary.
Violence is often thought to be the simplest solution when in fact it causes the most problems. A system solved with violence cna never end. Violence is often the easiest solution initially, but it causes many more difficult situations. A non-violent approach is mush harder to impliment, but once in place it makes solutions available.
Violence is not the answer unless the question is what is not the answer. today:I guess this system is like the system of credit, you get what you want initially, and more quickly, but you end up paying more for it and worrying about it for a longer period of time.
25.01.03- It's time for a nap, but I need to write first. I hate getting up early in the moring, I didn't go to swimming the last 2 days because I hate getting up. I've been thinking about projek K (go to ferrari's forums to read about this) lately. It is alot of stress that I don't need, but I brought upon myself by lettin all of you in on it. I know that if I don't do it I'll end up regretting it later so I have to. I have made up my mind that today sometime before it gets dark I'll call her and ask her what she's doing tonight. If tells me she isn't doing anything (because she hasn't picked up on anything) I'll explain to her what the past 4 years have been like for me and tell her what up, then ask her out. If she is doing somthing I'll just say I wanted to know what was goin' down cuz I was board. If it happens tonight (since 12:10 am is legally Saturday) then somebody is going to get paid and no matter what happens I'm going to lose some money. I'm really hopin' that this works out for me and that I get to take you bastards' money, not so much for the money, but for the lack of failure. I've done something like this twice before, both in 6th grade, and failed. Back then I didn't know what I was doing, I asked girls who I barely knew. This time I have 4 years of given up plans, 4 years of hopes, 4 years of dreams. If you hear from me Sunday you will know that all went well, if you don't then don't give me any shit on Monday. I've been able to look into her eyes lately, that helps me hold her attention, but I won't be able to do that on the phone. Tomarrow I'll decide if I want to call up sea cow for advice first, I'll probably take a quik poll. I've just decided now that I will call up sea cow tomarrow before I drop tha bomb. I think I'll call splendiferous too, I figure the more help I get the better chance I stand. Tonight I'm going to read my wonderful book that cory made fun of me for having: "women's best kept secrets". I think that book lies like a fish, but some of it is true. I can't decide on anything right now, I don't know what I should write, I'm just writing things as they come to me, welcome to my mind. This is how I think, it is quite insane. So here's the basic plan: tomarrow, wake up around 7 am (6 hours 40 minutes from now) and go to James's basketball game to watch him kick someone's ass becaus he is actually good at sports, which I never was. I figure the game will finish at about 9 or so, that's when I'll go home and do homework. At about 10 or 12 or 2 I'll make my 2 consultation calls, splendiferous first, then sea cow. at about 4 I'll drop tha bomb. If she says yes at 6 or 7 I'll be gettin' in tha g-wagon and do somethin' I've been dreamin about for 4 years. If she says no I'll go into my room and not come out for a few hours, I'll come out a broken man, but time will heal me. That is all the useless thought I'll subject you to for today, please drop by next time.
19.01.03- Today I got my brand new February edition of Super Street. I usually read the whole thing in 48 hours, but this time I'm trying to hold back. I read "Chu's or Loose" an article by none other than Ricky Chu of www.rikdaddy.com. The basic moral of that story is to not give a [edit] what other people have to say and just do what you want to do because life is too short to worry about other people's opinions about your stuff, your car in particular. I was thinking about re-writing the whole article on here, but that would be too much work, and you can just go buy the magazine because it is very entertaining (you can pick it up anywhere porn mags are sold). After reading that I will try to not pay attention to anyone's opinion (except for the pretty schlaidies) and start being insane again, like I used to be in middle school, when I didn't give a flying [edit] what other people had to say, and I did what I wanted (this included having a mowhawk for a day, and a few other things that I don't remember). Today I ran around the block because I felt like it, and I need to get in shape for swimming so I can actually do a lap without stopping in the middle of the pool to catch my breath. Whenever Dax and I quit being so lazy I will have all my words in a nice convenient box for you to close and never look at again, scroll to the bottom and click on the link to see the basic layout, please don't complain because I really don't care right now that the links don't work.
In other news, I made a new maximum for myself in bench pressing. Today I successfully benched 140lbs. It may not seem like much, but it is 5lbs below my weight, and I think that is good enough for me right now.
As far as automobs go I have had a bit of fun lately. Today I almost ran into someone who left their ass end hanging in my lane when they turned into the turn lane, and I wasn't paying attention so I hade to make a fun swerve around them. Thursday night Jonny K backed the van into John H's Civic. This run in left a mean crack in Jonny K's bumper, but didn't leave a mark on John's car. After that John "got some wire stuck in his wheel as Exodus" but we all know he was just banging his woman in the middle of the desert. Thursday night after my bigger younger brother James's basketball game I was going down Lohman when I saw a mean Kawasaki crotch rocket at blockbuster. When I was at the light at Solano waiting to turn left, he was right behind me. He turned left with me onto Solano going south, and we got a red on the other side of Lohman, we were side by side. My windows were down because that's how I like to cruise, so I ask the guy driving if he can do a wheelie, he says that he wouldn't because he had just got his bike back after he hit the back end while doing a wheelie and flew off of it. I asked him how fast he could go and he said that he had got it up to 135. After that the light turned green and he took off, fast as crap. I know that my car sucks right now with the slipping clutch so I didn't bother trying to keep up. When he was up a little way from me, I was in 3rd and I floored it, I got up to 55 in the 35 zone, then I just coasted. When I was down to about 50 I look in my rearview mirror and see flashing lights, no sirens though, tha popo is on my ass. So I pull over and stop and the cop just keeps going after the guy on the bike. The guy on the bike had turned onto a neighborhood and I can hear his bike revving high, with tha popo in hot pursuit. I don't know if he got away and I'm really hoping they aren't going to mail me a ticket. After school I was going down Boutz and James says that he thought he saw tha guy going the other way on Boutz, I don't know fo sho, but I sure hope it was him, that guy was crazy cool.